I don’t think the lack of love was the problem even though I can’t tell for sure since I didn’t know him personally. It’s true that sometime not feeling loved can lead to depression, but sometimes even if you are surrounded by your loved ones you can still feel depressed. I’m saying that as a person who has a family member who has been in deep depression for almost 10 years now and hasn’t got better no matter how much love we gave him.
Depression is something that can’t be explain. It can happen to anyone and there isn’t always a specific reason. It is a hate you feel throward yourself that keeps growing and growing and slowly you just start feeling nothing, a shell filled with only dark thought.
And in order to get out of it you need help, help of your loved one of course but also help of people who are professional and know what they do and have the tools to help you get out of the darkness. You also need to be able to express what you feel without feeling ashamed or judged in order to get better.
But unfortunately with our society now there’s no such thing.
The society is preventing you from expressing your suffering. As Jonghyun said he felt alone and felt that no one listened to him even though he had friends with whom he was talking about him feeling like dying. What he needed and what has to change is how the society deals with mental illness, reduce the pressure on people, give them the time to breath when they feel overwhelmed. If Jonghyun had had the opportunity to take a break from everything and relieve the pressure maybe it wouldn’t have ended so tragically.
The medical world also need a lot of improvement. The doctors world also helped leading to this terrible end. And this is unacceptable ! A doctor who is supposed to support his patient and help him get better made him feel even worse with his thoughtless words.
In order for this to stop happening, there need to be more talking and less discrimination against depression in the medical world too. Mental disease need to be more taught and discuss in medical schools, doctors needs to be sensitize with this and follow special formation to deal with people with mental illness, to know how to support them, know what to say, how to act, …
I’m a medical student myself and mental illness is very seldom mentioned however it is as important as physical illness. The very few psychiatrist teacher we have keep telling us that psychiatry is a very low regarded discipline and that they really lack of doctors in that filed which is totally aberrant regarding the increment of mental illness due to our pitiless society!
My point is that things NEED to change ! Some measures need to be taken to teach people, doctors, bosses, relatives, …. Because the less we talk about it, the more people will suffer and die because of people’s ignorance and stigmatisation !