- What do you call someone wearing a belt with a watch attached to it?
A waist of time.
You know what? Back in the 20’s there was a baseball team named Cleveland Browns. It was minor league. My gramma’s cousin (her dad’s brother’s kid) was on that team. I’d look him up but I can’t find anything about that team online. Just the newer football team.
Was it Cleveland or Cincinatti?.. I think Cleveland… gawd that was about 100 years ago now.
Oh,. I know so many people who told me that exact same thing during my years in Computer support!
Here’s one. and it’s so true.
I put thjis on somewhere but has different wording.
answer to riddle
Morning is the beginning of human life: you crawl on all fours. Then goes the afternoon, where you walk on two legs without any external help. And after that comes the evening – old age, when you have to use a walking stick (your “third leg”) to move around. As simple as that!
Standing up when you don’t have the strength needed in your leg muscles is a challenge. But, here’s a couple who figured out a sure fire way to get the gentleman up on his feet. Now, that’s one good service dog ! glad he loves chasing cats
Well, here’s one that I experienced. Back in the 90’s when we still printed reports on contiguous music ruled paper, the reports are separated by a start banner and an end banner. One day we get a call from a user complaining that the report was wrong, that it was printed in reverse, etc. Confused as to how we managed to screw up so badly I went round to this individual to see what we had done. She pointed to the report on her desk and proceeded to flick through the report demonstrating our mistake. I stopped her, picked up the report and flipped it so the start banner was on top and left without saying a word. (admittedly feeling a bit smug yet also concerned that the company had employed a graduate of the Midvale school for the gifted)
Ah Damn! You aren’t supposed to ‘OUT’ people like me!
Quickly close the door to her project room and hopes the contents therein don’t fall out into the hall.
heres another one
It’s 2021 & I’m 74years old and I still have so many unanswered questions!!! I STILL Haven’t found out who let the dogs out…where’s the beef…how to get to Sesame Street… why Dora doesn’t just use Google Maps…
.Why do all flavors of fruit loops taste exactly the same, or how many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop…why eggs are packaged in a flimsy carton, but batteries are secured in plastic that’s tough as nails…what does the fox say… why “abbreviated” is such a long word; or why is there a D in ‘fridge’ but not in refrigerator… why lemon juice is made with artificial flavor yet dish-washing liquid is made with real lemons… why they sterilize the needle for lethal injections… and, why do you have to “put your two cents in” but it’s only a “penny for your thoughts” where’s that extra penny going to…
why does The Alphabet Song and Twinkle Twinkle Little Star have the same tune… why did you just try to sing those two previous songs… and just what exactly is Victoria’s secret? and where is Waldo?.. Can you hear me now?..and do you really think I am this witty?? …
…Now it is your turn to take it from me… Copy and Paste, change the age, and enjoy your day.
laughter IS the best medic ine
You can give that penny to me for “If I got a penny for every time I heard someone quote that ‘If I got a penny for every time [x]’ saying”
I’d be a millionaire by now! (in half the time too)
Is the glass half empty or half full? …Never mind that, who drank half my drink?
hehehehehe, love it, and yes you would definately be a millionaire
hmmmm maybe this is what I should do!!